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Active Tips on How to Take Control of Your Life
There aren’t many feelings more incredibly demoralizing and frustrating than the sense that you just aren’t in control of your own life, and that things are spiraling further and further beyond your reach and influence with every passing moment.
Sadly, though, this isn’t a very uncommon feeling – in fact, there’s some pretty strong evidence out there that this feeling is becoming more and more common the further we head into an always-connected hi-tech and digital world.
There are all sorts of extremely useful and positive side effects of the complex systems we are embedded in these days.
But there are also downsides including, first and foremost, the fact that it can easily end up feeling like you’re just a cog in a machine without much ability to shape your destiny the way you want to.
Here are a few tips for taking control of your life, shrugging off the sense of helplessness, and overcoming the obstacles that litter the path, so that you can stay positive and enjoy your best life.
Seek simplicity, and do what you can to let a bit of “stillness” in
Do you think of yourself as a “good multitasker?” If you do, you might be in for an unpleasant surprise. According to psychological researchers in recent years, no one is actually a “good multitasker.”
Specifically, whenever anyone tries to do more than one thing at a time, their efficiency and skill at each task decrease dramatically, and their stress and anxiety rise dramatically, too.
It seems like, when all is said and done, people just feel their best and perform their best when they are focusing on fewer things, and don’t have too many distractions dragging on their attention.
The problem is, the world is “noisier” right now than it’s probably ever been – with an endless stream of information filling our living rooms, bedrooms, and even cars, at all times of the day and night.
If it’s not your boss getting in touch with you via an instant messenger app, it’s you reading the news online at two in the morning, or scrolling through your social media feeds every time you have to wait in a queue for more than two minutes.
To regain a sense of control, you’ve really got to step outside that stream of constant noise and information, from time to time. Seek out simplicity in your own life and do what you can to let a bit of “stillness” in.
This doesn’t mean that you have to live a boring or dull life. But it does mean you should focus on “quality over quantity” and should find ways to make your everyday life less jam-packed with things that drag you out of the present moment or cause you to feel distracted, stressed, or anxious.
Focusing on one or two hobbies instead of 10, and spending your evenings reading a book from time to time, can really help you to feel more like you’re in the driver’s seat.
Pay attention to your style and presentation, and always try to look your best
We all know that looks and physical appearances aren’t the most important things in life and that our value and worth as people is defined by things like how we treat others, and what kind of values and principles we act out, as opposed to how good our eyebrows look.
All the same, paying attention to your style and presentation, as well as striving to look your best, can be a really great way of helping yourself to feel more in control of your life.
If you’ve been unhappy with the way you’ve been looking, anything you can do to move things closer towards your ideal is going to help you to feel more in control.
Of course, there will be things that you can’t necessarily change about your appearance – but there are always things you can change about the way you present yourself, your personal style, and how you decide to show yourself to the world on an everyday basis.
If there are particular issues that have been bothering you, such as bad teeth? Then doing something tangible like getting a dental appointment may not only help you to smile again with confidence.
It can also leave you feeling like you’ve overcome a significant obstacle and have taken a positive step to lead your life in a direction of your choosing.
Develop the skill of doing uncomfortable things that you know you should be doing
Being “in control” of your life has a lot to do with being “in control” of your actions, in spite of how you feel.
No matter how positive and outgoing someone may be, no one is always hyper-motivated to go to the gym or to fill out a job application, at all times.
Of course, it’s easier said than done to “force” yourself to do uncomfortable but productive and positive things. In fact, it’s a skill that needs to be developed.
If you want to be in control of your life, but haven’t felt that way for a while, maybe what you should focus on is developing the skill of doing uncomfortable things that you know you should be doing. Take it step-by-step.
Commit to something – whether that’s a coding course, or a regular workout routine – and hold yourself accountable to it. The longer you are able to go with it, without giving up or making excuses, the more “in control” you are going to be in general.
Come up with goals and systems that can help to get you to where you want to be
It’s unlikely that you’re really going to end up feeling “in control” of your life if you don’t have a pretty well-defined sense of where you want to be, and a decent plan for how to head in that direction.
After all, “just going with the flow” is the opposite of being in control – it’s all about letting circumstances control you, and just deciding to be happy with the course things take.
So, set yourself some goals for what you want to achieve in your life, and be pretty ambitious. Then, come up with some systems and habits that you think will help to move you towards achieving those goals.
No doubt these goals and routines will need to be adjusted and tweaked over time. But the more you tweak and adjust them, the more effective they are likely to become.
Decide what you want, and then go for it.